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On my way up to the party from Kansas City, it occurred to me that since the party was going to take place in Illinois, nobody would be able to bring fireworks. Being the helpful Missouri resident that I am, I stopped somewhere halfway across the state to pick up some combustible goods. The party hosts were very grateful, though some of the guests, raised, most likely, by democrats, exhibited reactions from shock to abhorration. Others, however, thought it was fun to blow shit up.

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